Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
What should I do about my boyfriend's inability to satisfy me sexually? He only cares about his own pleasure, which is selfish. How do I tell him about mine?
If you can't talk to him about his inability to satisfy you sexually, there's something not quite right about your relationship. He deserves to know what he's doing right, or wrong, and you are as entitled to your pleasure as he is. Maybe he is just unaware about how you feel, so you ought to talk about it. And if he is aware and doesn't care, that should tell you how he thinks about you too.
Either way, you need to be as happy in bed as he is.
My boyfriend insists on splitting the bill whenever we go out, because he says it's all about equality. I was happy to do this for a month or two, but I now think he uses it as an excuse simply to get out of paying more money. I'm not saying he's cheap, but I think it's ridiculous to use an excuse like this. He should just come right out and say it, because at least then I may have more respect for him.
I don't know how to broach the topic though, without it being embarrassing for him. Also, if it turns out that he genuinely believes this, I will end up coming across as a cynical woman who doesn't want to pay for anything. What do you suggest I do?
You really should just speak to him. It's not about you coming across as cynical, it's just about being able to discuss something that bothers you. If there was something about you that bothered him enormously, his silence on the matter would only drive a wedge between the two of you over time. Don't let anything, no matter how trivial, bother you over a period of time, because it just makes things harder in the future. Speak up and sort it out while you still can.
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