Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
My father has asked me not to go out with a boy I like because he smokes. He's a great guy, except for this awful habit. How can I convince my father?
Why not convince your boyfriend to stop smoking instead? That way, he will be alive for a while longer, which will give you more time to convince your father.
My wife and I are considering having a child, but we have some serious disagreements about how this child should be raised and, more importantly, where. I am in favour of moving to another city, because I think it makes sense to go to a quieter place where there are more open spaces, but my wife is adamant about raising a child here because she believes it's where the good schools are. If we can't see eye to eye about these things now, how will we cope with a child after he or she is born? Should we speak to a counsellor? I don't want to get into a situation where we end up drifting apart a few years from now, simply because we can't agree upon where our child must go to school.
This isn't a huge problem, simply because it's a time when the two of you are trying to find a balance of sorts. There will always be agreements and disagreements about everything under the sun, because that's how relationships evolve. Deciding to have a child is about bigger things. It's about the two of you wanting to raise a human being together, so that's what you should focus on, rather than imagine a future where the two of you separate because you can't see eye to eye on which school the child must go to. Speak about this often, and share your fears, because that is the only way you will both arrive at a place where you can accept the other's point of view. Don't let minor disagreements divert you from the bigger picture here.
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