'I want to marry my girlfriend, but is it too soon?'
Introducing Dr Love, who solves your relationship riddles in a confusing digital age
What's a good time to tell someone that you want to marry them? I think it's time I proposed to my girlfriend because we have been dating for three years now. Should I wait for another year, or is it okay for me to tell her how I feel now?
There is no manual on timing. If you feel as if you would like to take this relationship to the next level and spend the rest of your life with her, you should tell her that the minute you feel like it.
My boyfriend wants us to go on a holiday together because he wants to have sex. I don't have a problem with having sex with him, but I think he's obsessed with it. He wants to do it all the time, and loses interest in me the minute we are done. He doesn't think of holidays as a time for us to chat, share our feelings or get to know each other better. He makes me feel like an object, which ruins every holiday I have ever gone on with him.
I explained to him that this would end in a break-up because of his behaviour, but he is more concerned about me going on a holiday with him than he is about the possible end of our relationship. I don't feel valued at all. What can I do about this?
You have to think about whether or not you feel respected in this relationship. Sex is important, but not more important than you feeling as if you are being treated with the respect you deserve. If you have a problem with how he behaves, and it seems as if your presence or absence is of little importance in his life beyond the bedroom, you need to evaluate what exactly it is you're getting out of being in a relationship with this man. You owe it to yourself to be with someone who values you at all times, because that's what solid relationships are about.
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