'How do I tell him I'm not ready for physical intimacy?'

By  Dr Love | Mumbai | Posted  08-Jun-2017

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I'm in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend and we meet once a year. He wants to get physically intimate with me when we meet the next time. I'm not ready for this because I'm only 18 and he is 22. What should I do? I don't want to lose him, but I don't want to lose my virginity either. — Shweta M

Is he implying that this relationship will end if you don't sleep with him? If he is, there is no point in you continuing to be with him. You shouldn't sleep with anyone unless you really want to, and he needs to understand that. Being your boyfriend doesn't make it okay for him to demand this either, if you're not comfortable with the idea. I suggest you speak to him and simply tell him that you're not ready. If he cares enough about you to respect your wishes, he will understand. If he doesn't, you shouldn't worry about him too much. You're 18. You have a whole life ahead of you, and there will always be more understanding people in it. Don't do anything you don't want to.

My girlfriend isn't interested in going on a holiday with me, despite the fact that we have been together for almost a year now. She says it's too soon. I don't know what she means. Why does she want to be in a relationship if she doesn't want to go out with me on a holiday?

If she's not comfortable with the idea, for whatever reason, why not ask her to explain? If she wants to go on a holiday with you, she will when she's okay with the idea. Why force her into something? She's still in a relationship with you, which means she wants to be. Why equate going on a holiday with anything else? Give her time and let her know that it's okay. Also, why not simply consider going alone for once? It may be good for you.

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