'My doubting boyfriend keeps me on a tight leash'

By  Dr. Love | Posted  03-Mar-2017

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My boyfriend doesn't trust me and doesn't allow me to go anywhere. I want him to trust me, believe me and love me. What should I do?
— Siya K


To begin with, he isn't legally allowed to prevent you from going anywhere you choose to. As for the trust and love, it's a Catch 22 situation. If he trusted and loved you, he wouldn't restrict you. If he doesn't trust you, your relationship is going nowhere. I'd point that out to him. If he refuses to change, I'm afraid this is going to end badly for you.

There is a girl I have been in touch with a lot in the past. Eventually, I fell in love with her, even though we didn't actually meet and were only chat buddies. I proposed to her eventually, but she said that due to past experiences, she wasn't comfortable with a relationship of any sort. Since then, we have only chatted occasionally. She knows I love her, but acts like it doesn't matter. I have tried to meet her repeatedly, but she hasn't fixed a date despite my many requests. I don't message her much anymore, and she replies just once every two months or so. What should I do? I don't have strong feelings for her anymore, but I still like her.
— Rajat B
I'm not sure how you can convince yourself of being in love with someone you have never met. I think she has the right idea too. If a stranger told me he or she was in love with me, without having set eyes on me, I'd have a problem agreeing to a meeting too. It sounds a little creepy, to be honest. Besides, given how chatting works, who's to say your lady friend isn't just an old man just trying to have some fun? If you don't have feelings for her anymore, why pursue her? Why not spend time with a real person for a change? Try it; it's a lot better than chatting with a stranger.

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